Let's Be Honest, Listening is a Little Scary

Don't forget to speak your mind, and most importantly don't be scared to listen. Why scared, you may ask? Well because, listening is scary. Listening causes us to be put in that awkward situation where someone we care about says the not so flattering things, no one likes to hear. Listening means accepting that you have failed in certain ways, it also means discovering that you are awesome in certain areas, you were never aware of. Listening is scary because it's different from hearing. Listening means actually having to do a little work on the front end (taking in what has been said) and on the back end (trying to make adjustments). 

 Listening is scared, because sometimes listening means change. Change is something very few of us like (no matter what we say) and even fewer of us are capable of readily accepting. Keep in mind that anything worth having, is worth working for. Remember that many times fear is our greatest deterrent from being great. This not only translates to our personal lives, but also our relationships. Don't be afraid. Lend and ear, listen, and learn today.

Social Media and Dating, When to let it Go

"I'm just looking!" many people have said that in relationships, when confronted by a significant other, or when justifying their own behavior which might be a little suspect. For some reason the social norm once we enter a relationship, is to assume that we no longer have eyes or senses, and never find another person remotely interesting or attractive. Since, virtually everyone is connected to some type of social media outlet, this same dilemma that takes place on a daily basis in the real world, has become amplified, in a frenzied, whirlwind of likes, bikini photos, and half nude selfies.

In our current world of "Likes and Shares", where should we draw the line, when it comes to interaction with the opposite sex on social media, if we are in a relationship? The "Instagram Rules for Men", lays out a few tips, that sound down right wrong. "Comments you post don't appear in the Following section. They can see when you like a pic, Not when you comment". If you are looking to be an Instagram sleaze, this advice will probably be very useful. If you are looking to be honest in your relationship, and avoid putting yourself in situations where you feel like you have to lie or hide anything! If you have to lie or hide something related to the opposite sex, chances are it will probably make your partner fairly upset. Now take it a step further, and ask yourself, "is it really worth it?". Is liking a picture of a woman in a g-string, or a dude in a banana hammock, standing in front of a dirty bathroom mirror or disheveled bedroom, really worth having the person you see everyday, love everyday, and actually want to be with upset? If the answer is a resounding "Yes!", then by all means, take these rules and make them work for you. If it isn't, it's probably time to take out your phone and start "un-following" or "de-friending", those attention starved guys and gals you have to sneak and look at when your boyfriend or girlfriends back is turned. Basic rules for relationships and social media. If it can cause you to get yelled at, slapped, or dumped just let it go.

Just a little fun!

All of our blog post don't have to be super serious, or advice driven. We are perfectly capable of having a little bit of fun too...well fun with a message! How well do you think you know your partner? Often times we think we know the "idea" of who we think they are, but are fairly unfamiliar with who they really are. This can be attributed to our own hubris and need to put things in their proper place for our own peace of mind. The problem is real, successful, honest relationships cannot function that way. Click the link below, and take the test provided by the Gottman Institute to find out how well you really know your partner. If you want to get the most out of it, you have to really try! don't give the answer that you think you should provide, give the one that's honest, even if it doesn't make you look too good!

Gottman Institute Quiz