The Art Of Gift Giving

Ok, I’m about to tell an ugly truth.  Most women are horrible gift givers.  That’s Right! I said it! Now if your reading this and your thinking to yourself “That’s not true. I gave my man a PS4 and a cold beer for his birthday”, then you’re the exception, not the rule.  Also, why are you not sharing your wisdom with the legion of woman giving out Cosby sweaters and books as gifts? 

Here’s the thing, in most cases a man will pick a gift that is exclusively for his lady.  This is even true when they pick bad gifts, such as a vacuum, ports and pans.  Woman, on the other hand, often give their men the things they want them to have.  And in that lies the issues.  Buying him tickets to a play or a show you wanted to see is not a gift.  That’s just a date he didn’t have to pay for.  Has your man ever bought you ticks to WWE Smack Down, knowing that wrestling is his not your cup of tea and tried to pass it off as a something he is doing for you.  And if he did I’m sure he is still hearing about it. 

Ladies, here is a good rule of thumb when shopping for the men in you lives.

1.     Do I know what he is interested in?

2.     Does this gift benefit him or me?

3.     Will it make him happy?

It’s this bloggers opinion that woman are more sensitive, attentive and caring when it comes to keeping a relationship connected, but sometimes you can lose your individuality.  That’s why it’s good to honor each other’s personal interest with a gift.  Trust me, he will be appreciative of your thoughtfulness.

What do you want to Eat?!

I'm sure you've all seen this video by now, For every guy who has ever asked a girl “what do you want to eat?” just to hear her say I don’t know, I feel your pain.  This is a battle that has been waging on since the caveman first dragged home a pound of T-Rex meat, which I’m told taste a lot like chicken. 

To be honest, it’s a battle that will never end, but on behalf of all the men on earth let me explain why this makes no since to us.

1. Men are in most cases greedy, pick any restaurant and we will find something on the menu we like.  If not we’ll just put bacon on something healthy and call it a day. 

2. Women are in most cases picky, which is why we would rather you pick so we don’t have to hear the complaints.

3. This is not your first time eating food, right, RIGHT!?  

4. How on God’s green earth can you run down a list of all the places you don’t want to eat but can’t pick one place where you do want to eat?

5. If you say we can pick you can’t veto every choice we make.

I have never been in the mind of a woman but this is how I imagine the “where to eat” conversation plays out.

“Oh, where do I want to eat? Well, what did I eat today? What did I eat yesterday?  I was good today. All I had was four grapes and some Chick-Fil-A for lunch.  Plus it was a grilled chicken sandwich too! Oh, but I did have that slice of cake yesterday. Cake! No girl, no. Don’t give in to chocolate cake, or red velvet cake.  Cupcakes are ok though, right?  I mean they’re so small. They can’t have that many calories.  What’s the name of that app Suzie uses to keep track of her calories?  She’s so skinny. I hate her.  I’ll just let him pick and wherever we go I’ll get a salad.  But then I’ll have to watch him eat like a pig and gain one pound. Men are such jerks. I wonder what he’s getting me for my birthday?”

By this time 20 plus minutes have passed and you look up to see the Golden Arches.  Ladies this is not a hard question in the mind of a man. We oversimplify things, true but food is a necessity and should not be a complicated choice.  There are so many other things in your relationship you could be devoting this time to.

Trust me, I’m a Relationship Ninja!

- Racer X